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Two Cheaters Donít Make One Right
The sting of being cheated on goes far beyond the heart. The heart may not even be where it is felt first. The ego takes more of a beating than the heart does. One of the reasons for this is that in everybodyís life there is more than one person who loves them. It may not be romantic love, but it is still love. The heart is not the organ that discerns the difference between the love from a lover or a family member. The brain does that; and we thought the brain was the smart one in the relationship! Itís true! The heart feels full when it receives love from any source, even from manís best friend.
Men are known to frequently transfer most of their uncomfortable emotions to anger. It is a coping mechanism that allows them to keep their ego in check when they are feeling week by emotional or physical pain. Women do the opposite. Women take their feelings of shortcoming or lack and translate them into painful experiences. The common factor in both ways of dealing with feelings is ego. Ego plays a bigger role in what people do than they like to admit. Ego gets in the way of a lot of things, and it has quite the reputation of getting between people and what they truly want. Ego is a separator. It is the part of us that wants to feel good and will separate us from what it interprets as feeling bad. When the ego feels attacked it fights back.
Being cheated on is one sure way to get the ego on the rampage. It may seem like heart break is at the root of all thoughts at this time, but it is definitely sharing the spotlight with our hurt pride. Nothing says bruised ego like wanting a good dose of revenge. Just the thought of causing pain to the person who hurt us is enough to soothe the pain of knowing that we, unknowingly, shared the person we love with somebody else.
Sometimes just making the plan to cheat and having the intention to carry it out is enough to clear the mind so that all the reasons that it is a bad idea become perfectly clear. Some of the reasons why getting back at your ex for cheating, by cheating may not be a good idea are:
- Having sex with anybody at this time will likely remind you of your ex.
- Anything to do with sex will remind you that your ex is probably having sex with the other person.
- The person you have the fling with will not know you as well as your ex making the experience seem unsatisfying.
- Numbing the pain will let you forget how intense it is, but when the numbness wears off it could seem worse.
- Being sexual with somebody who you do not love could cause you to feel guilty, only adding to the negative feelings you are already having.
ďTwo wrongs donít make a rightĒ, might be good words to live by right now. The bottom line is to feel better. Getting down on the level of the person who betrayed you will only bring you more pain. This is a good time to maybe take a little advise from your ego and separate yourself from the rat who cheated on you.